People who have that sneaky mental twist that allows them to smile at mankind's fumbles and foibles by putting one of those into a joke deserve accolades in our today's world of toil and strife. Wouldn't you agree?
Unfortunately, I can't give the originators of the following yuks, which I consider well worthy of passing on, because I gleaned them from a column titled The Edge, over a period of time, in the local Lewiston Tribune, where they were not credited. But I think those originators will be happy to share anonymously anyhow.\
1) A little girl asked her mother for a dollar to give to an old lady in the park. Her mother was touched by her child's kindness and gave her the dollar. Curious, she asked the child, "Isn't the lady able to work anymore?"
"Oh, yes," came the reply. "She sells candy."
2) My neighbor lady was talking to her four-year old son about imminent family visitations. He asked her why all their relatives from Wisconsin talked funny and sounded like their noses were plugged up.
"Well, they think we talk funny too," she said. "Everybody talks in different ways. They think we talk really slow, with our words all d-r-a-w-n out."
The boy's eyes got big and he whispered seriously, "You mean they hear funny too?"
3) The small boy asked his father how people came to be. His father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, their babies became adults and made more babies, and on and on like that."
Not satisfied with that, the boy then went to his mother and asked her how people came to be..She told him, "We were monkeys first, then we evolved into people like we are now."
Confused, the boy raced back to his father and told him, "You lied to me. Mom said we were monkeys. We didn't come from Adam and Eve."
The father, unperturbed, replied, "Your mom was talking about HER side of the family!
4) Harry walked up to the minister after services, "You know, reverend, I'm in a real quandary. I'd like to attend church next Sunday, but I can't possibly miss the big game next Sunday."
"But, Harry," replied the rev, "don't you know that is what DVRs are for?"
Harry's face lit up. "You mean I could record your sermon?"
5) A flight attendant on a cross country flight about 30 minutes out of Los Angeles nervously announced, "I don't know how this happened, but we have 103 passengers aboard and only 40 dinners available.
When the passengers muttering had died down, she continued, "Anyone who is kind enough to give up his meal, though, will receive free drinks for the remainder of the trip."
Her next announcement came an hour later. "If anyone wants to change their mind, we still have 29 dinners available."
6) There was a papa mole, a mama mole and a baby mole who lived in a hole in the country near a farmhouse. One morning papa mole poked his head outside the hole and announced,. "Mama, I smell sausage."
So mama mole poked her head out and added, "Ummm. And I smell pancakes."
So baby mole tried to stick his head out the hole, but couldn't because his parents were blocking it. Disappointed, he whined, "The only thing I can smell is molasses."
Admit it. You smiled awhile, didn't you?
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