Thursday, August 1, 2013

Short Stories in Doggerel

     I'm not into poetry, but doggerel humor does amuse and intrigue me. Where else can one find complete short stories, with surprise endings, in just a few lines of text?

My poetry is nonsense
And full of frivolities;
People may say I'm lacking
In my mental faculties!
                  --Those who disagree with me

It isn't the meter,
It isn't the rime,
It's only ideas
Short of which I'm!
                  --Robertr G. Peck, Jr.

SWEETEST GUY
He's demanding, that's true,
Unpredictable too.
He's a rascal (knows that he's handsome)
And is bold, yet shy.
He's the sweetest little guy.
He's four, and I love him....my grandson!
                 --Liz Smith

TWO FOR THE MONEY...
A dashing young fellow named Joe
Has lost all his happy glow;
He used to be sunny
And had plenty of money,
But that was two blondes ago!
                    --Ft. Belvoir Castle

PER VERSE
She's in mink
And looks divine;
I'm in serge
And simply shine!
               --Pensacola Gasport

DIFFERENT PATHS
Jim blew his money, loafed and shirked;
   John planned and saved, worked and worked.
So Jim never attained success,
   While John toiled on with strain and stress --
      And never made it either!
                  --Berton Braley

FOUR-EYED GLAMOUR
Women respect the male sex,
If and when they wear specs,
'Cause girls can never make asses
Of boys who wear glasses!
                 --Earl Wilson

HEAVEN SCENT
I don't like skunks
And won't until
Skunks start using
Chlorophyll!
              --/Zany Janey

RECOGNITION
I haven't any ankles;
I haven[t any feet.
I'm just a little earthworm
One long hunk of meat!
              --Anon

DIETWISE
How fat she are.
She used to wasn't.
The reason is
She daily doesn't!
            --Anon

JACK & JILL UPDATE
Jack and Jill went up the hill -
They each had a dollar and a quarter -
Jill cam down
With half a crown....
They evidently didn't go up for water!
               --Wilbur Smith in "The Eye of the Tiger"

TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN
Asters are red,
Delphiniums blue;
Cold in the head...
September flu.
I'll be in bed
A day or two...
Adieu - Achoo!
           --Sal Hep







No comments:

Post a Comment