Last column explained an old word game that tested one's vocabulary called Stink Pink. One person would present a (hopefully) humorous deftnition, plus the number of syllables in the two rhyming words being sought. It was a mad fad for a time with even newspaper columnists and comic section cartoonists being drawn into it.
That column seems to have resonated with some of my senior friends who remembered it and started playing it at the local senior center. They have come up with such a plethora of rhymings as to amaze and amuse me that I'm passing them on to you readers.
One-syllable matchings:
Ex-lax = purge urge
Urge to do something = slim whim
A hospital's first-aid kit = nurse purse
Dog house = mutt hut
Crying twin babies = scream team
Duck dinner = quack snack
Handsome couple dressed for a formal = Slick chick and sleek sheik
Smart conversation rejoinder = hip quip
The first Bikini = Eve's leaves
Dumb seller of stolen goods = dense fence
Medieval land grab = fief thief
Rainy-day taxi shortage = hack lack
Monarch's jewelry = king's rings
Preparation for a foul dinner = chicken pickin'
Fish story = reel spiel
Fancy chandelier = class glass
Lady Godiva on a bender = stewed nude
Spanking = seat heat
cemetery = bone zone
wrinkles = age gauge
Tabloid = smash trash
Two-syllable matchings:
Pet cat needing a combing = shabby tabby
Result of a rap contest = lipping whipping
Un-hip mother = dummy mummy
Relative who is always phoning = buzzin' cousin
African drum = Congo bongo
Sunburned aspiring actress = scarlet starlet
Shortest distance between two antagonistic cats = feline beeline
Cracked-up skier = aching breaking
Person asking to be kissed = smoocher moocher
Pedestrian crossing a busy street = bumper jumper
Church-run shellfish business = oyster cloister
Protectors of the universe = global nobles
Beautiful but sad female = wryful eyeful
Male turned female = gender bender
Sunday church activity = sermon squirmin'
Eye doctor = winker tinker
Stomach specialist = gizzard wizard
Hash = griddle riddle
Baby sitter = yelper helper
Three-syllable matchings:
Seamstress doing fancy work = stitchery witchery
Raffish man-of-the-cloth = sinister minister
Zoo worker who takes care of red birds with black wings = Tanager manager
Super-powered slingshot = fantastic elastic
Horse that pulled a wrecked farm vehicle out of a bog = ex-tractor extractor
Four-syllable matchings:
Middle-Eastern fruit vendor's establishment = Afghanistan banana-stand
New York whiskey storage vault = Knickerbocker liquor-locker
Tuesday, September 27, 2016
Wednesday, September 21, 2016
R. Loeffelbein's WHATCHAMA COLUMN: Remember "Stink Pink"?
I was telling a friend recently about the young man, eyes on his iPhone, unaware of all else around him, who came within one horn toot on my part of walking smack-dab into the side of my moving car. This led to some memory gathering about other just-as-silly fads we remembered.
There was the "Knock-Knock" fad: "Knock knock", "Who's there?" "Greta." "Greta who?" (punchline) "Greta life, you lazy bum!"
And there was the "Handies" fad, where, for instance, you stuck a finger in your mouth, revolved your other hand around your ear clockwise, and everyone was supposed to guess you were pantomiming a pencil sharpener.
And there was my favorite, called "Stink Pink".
These were great ice breakers at parties. You know, where everyone is sitting around making friendly noises at each other while they sniff breaths to see who has the booze at the party! With these, strangers at a party didn't need a common bond to converse on. The games established one. Conversation wasn't needed. While sipping, or chewing, everyone hatched clever Stink Pinks to share. Even if someone came up empty, he or she would usually have imbibed enough drink so the ice would be broken anyhow. So it seemed a sure-fire method for mixing up the participants.
Let me explain how the game worked. The first step was to think up a set of two rhyming words - an adjective and a noun or pronoun - like "Zestful chestfull". This you kept to yourself, since it was to be the ultimate answer the others were to guess from the clues you furnish them.
To the gathering you give hints in two parts: (1) a (preferably funny) dictionary-type deftnition of your rhyming words (which must, incidentally, be the same length) and (2) the number of syllables in your chosen words. Stink Pink = one syllable, stinky pinky = two, stinkity pinkity = three, and for every added syllable add in another "it". Example: "Actress with a more-so torso, stinky pinky". The answer:"zestfull chestfull".
If anyone comes up with a word set of more than four syllables they should be classed as genius, above the hoi-polio, and should be down in the village drinking Scotch with the intellectuals, not playing silly word games at our party, where no one would guess the damn thing anyhow. Two examples did surface at our games - ineffectual intellectual and comprehensible reprehensible - and, as expected, they stumped our partiers completely. The perpetrator, it turned out, had browsed the dictionary for a week to come up with them.
In the eventuality this game intrigues anyone enough to try, here is a set of sample Stink Pinks we brain-stormed for you.
What is a burlesk stripper on the bumps-and-brinds circuit called, stink-pink?
What is a municipal jester, stink-pink?
What would a happy father be, stink-pink and stinky-pinky??
What is a desert song, stink-pionk?
What is a censosr's most used article of equipment, stinky-pinky?
What is a baby with a lack of social responsibility, stinky-pinky?
What is a gal with the moaning after the night before, stinky-pinky?
What is a honey-dipped lieutenant junior-grade, stinky-pinky?
What is the luscious fruit growing around a sandy clime, stink-pink?
What is swimming in a sewer, stinky-pinky?
What is a beautifu, but dumb, gal with "identical" charms, stinky-pinky?
What is lettuce cut up without dressing, stinky-pinky?
What is a skinny spook, stink-pink?
What's an African cat caretaker known as, stinky-pinky?
What are French post cards, stinkitity-pinkitity?
ANSWERS:
Lewd Nude
Town Clown
Glad Dad, Happy Pappy
Dune Tune
Quizzer's Scissors
Piddling Kidling
Blearie Dearie
Gooey Looey
Beach Peach
Muciing Ducking
Simple Dimples
Daring Paring
Gaunt Haunt
Leopard Shepherd
Pornography Photography
This game even made it into a popular Sunday section newspaper column of this earlier era, titled Charlie Rice's Punchbowl. He called it "Hink-Pink". He did a column and invited readership send-ins and was inundated with 3,000 responses.
This game was actually so widespread that a comic strip titled "On Stage", by Leonard Starr, featured it one Sunday. He called it the Rhymie-Stymie game, though, and came up with such stunning rhyming sets as unilateral collateral (one-sided security), enigmatical sabbatical (puzzling vacation), endemic polymic (localized controversy), lexiphanic mechanic (phrase-mongering machinist), abecedarian parliamentaraian (novice statesman)
There was the "Knock-Knock" fad: "Knock knock", "Who's there?" "Greta." "Greta who?" (punchline) "Greta life, you lazy bum!"
And there was the "Handies" fad, where, for instance, you stuck a finger in your mouth, revolved your other hand around your ear clockwise, and everyone was supposed to guess you were pantomiming a pencil sharpener.
And there was my favorite, called "Stink Pink".
These were great ice breakers at parties. You know, where everyone is sitting around making friendly noises at each other while they sniff breaths to see who has the booze at the party! With these, strangers at a party didn't need a common bond to converse on. The games established one. Conversation wasn't needed. While sipping, or chewing, everyone hatched clever Stink Pinks to share. Even if someone came up empty, he or she would usually have imbibed enough drink so the ice would be broken anyhow. So it seemed a sure-fire method for mixing up the participants.
Let me explain how the game worked. The first step was to think up a set of two rhyming words - an adjective and a noun or pronoun - like "Zestful chestfull". This you kept to yourself, since it was to be the ultimate answer the others were to guess from the clues you furnish them.
To the gathering you give hints in two parts: (1) a (preferably funny) dictionary-type deftnition of your rhyming words (which must, incidentally, be the same length) and (2) the number of syllables in your chosen words. Stink Pink = one syllable, stinky pinky = two, stinkity pinkity = three, and for every added syllable add in another "it". Example: "Actress with a more-so torso, stinky pinky". The answer:"zestfull chestfull".
If anyone comes up with a word set of more than four syllables they should be classed as genius, above the hoi-polio, and should be down in the village drinking Scotch with the intellectuals, not playing silly word games at our party, where no one would guess the damn thing anyhow. Two examples did surface at our games - ineffectual intellectual and comprehensible reprehensible - and, as expected, they stumped our partiers completely. The perpetrator, it turned out, had browsed the dictionary for a week to come up with them.
In the eventuality this game intrigues anyone enough to try, here is a set of sample Stink Pinks we brain-stormed for you.
What is a burlesk stripper on the bumps-and-brinds circuit called, stink-pink?
What is a municipal jester, stink-pink?
What would a happy father be, stink-pink and stinky-pinky??
What is a desert song, stink-pionk?
What is a censosr's most used article of equipment, stinky-pinky?
What is a baby with a lack of social responsibility, stinky-pinky?
What is a gal with the moaning after the night before, stinky-pinky?
What is a honey-dipped lieutenant junior-grade, stinky-pinky?
What is the luscious fruit growing around a sandy clime, stink-pink?
What is swimming in a sewer, stinky-pinky?
What is a beautifu, but dumb, gal with "identical" charms, stinky-pinky?
What is lettuce cut up without dressing, stinky-pinky?
What is a skinny spook, stink-pink?
What's an African cat caretaker known as, stinky-pinky?
What are French post cards, stinkitity-pinkitity?
ANSWERS:
Lewd Nude
Town Clown
Glad Dad, Happy Pappy
Dune Tune
Quizzer's Scissors
Piddling Kidling
Blearie Dearie
Gooey Looey
Beach Peach
Muciing Ducking
Simple Dimples
Daring Paring
Gaunt Haunt
Leopard Shepherd
Pornography Photography
This game even made it into a popular Sunday section newspaper column of this earlier era, titled Charlie Rice's Punchbowl. He called it "Hink-Pink". He did a column and invited readership send-ins and was inundated with 3,000 responses.
This game was actually so widespread that a comic strip titled "On Stage", by Leonard Starr, featured it one Sunday. He called it the Rhymie-Stymie game, though, and came up with such stunning rhyming sets as unilateral collateral (one-sided security), enigmatical sabbatical (puzzling vacation), endemic polymic (localized controversy), lexiphanic mechanic (phrase-mongering machinist), abecedarian parliamentaraian (novice statesman)
Monday, September 5, 2016
R. Loeffelbein's WHATCHAMA COLUMN: "Fool's Names Like Fool's Faces..."
"Fool's names like fool's faces are always seen in public places!" was a comment always forthcoming from my grandmother upon seeing any public place defiled with the "tag" of some graffiti "artist".
I, on the other hand, have rather enjoyed the other side of the on-going graffiti defacing war, the humor notes they invite from graffiti observers, like the sign found on a backstage wall at our local amateur theater building when the building was inspected and found unsafe: "Please don't write your name on the walls. If you're good enough, we'll remember you."
A similar request was penned on a freshly painted classroom wall at the local college: "This is a partition, not a petition. No signatures required."
One of my all-time favorite graffiti-stoppers, though, was posted above a urinal in the men's room at a country store in Texas. It read, "Please note: The same fingers that remove the cigarette butts from this urinal are the ones that fix our hamburgers," The urinal was butt free!
Good advice goes right along with some nice philosophy in the world of graffiti. For instance, this appeared on the wall of a café in Austin, Tx: "Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening all at once." Pretty impressive thoughts to come out of a sojurn in a toilet!
Another worldly bit I have long remembered, but forgotten the source, is "Be yourself. Who else is better qualified?"
Sometimes bulletin board notices end up as second-hand humorous graffiti. "Will the thief who stole my jacket please return it?" was one such notice. Then it was addended the next day with "I found your jacket and intended to return it. But I don't like being called a thief! So I gave it to the Salvation Army." Cause and effect are not always in sync!
A similarly unexpected rejoinder was noted in an industrial building corridor filled with colorful posters bearing slogans intended to inspire employees. Under the exhortation "You Can - If You Will!" someone had amended, "You're Canned If You Won't!"
Office copy machines, I've noted, usually have an often necessary sign on them stating something like, "For problems, call extension 233". Just as often, the office wit will have added a comment. One I saw, for-example, read, 'No thanks - I have plenty of my own!" A lot of us recognize the feeling behind that!
I, on the other hand, have rather enjoyed the other side of the on-going graffiti defacing war, the humor notes they invite from graffiti observers, like the sign found on a backstage wall at our local amateur theater building when the building was inspected and found unsafe: "Please don't write your name on the walls. If you're good enough, we'll remember you."
A similar request was penned on a freshly painted classroom wall at the local college: "This is a partition, not a petition. No signatures required."
One of my all-time favorite graffiti-stoppers, though, was posted above a urinal in the men's room at a country store in Texas. It read, "Please note: The same fingers that remove the cigarette butts from this urinal are the ones that fix our hamburgers," The urinal was butt free!
Good advice goes right along with some nice philosophy in the world of graffiti. For instance, this appeared on the wall of a café in Austin, Tx: "Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening all at once." Pretty impressive thoughts to come out of a sojurn in a toilet!
Another worldly bit I have long remembered, but forgotten the source, is "Be yourself. Who else is better qualified?"
Sometimes bulletin board notices end up as second-hand humorous graffiti. "Will the thief who stole my jacket please return it?" was one such notice. Then it was addended the next day with "I found your jacket and intended to return it. But I don't like being called a thief! So I gave it to the Salvation Army." Cause and effect are not always in sync!
A similarly unexpected rejoinder was noted in an industrial building corridor filled with colorful posters bearing slogans intended to inspire employees. Under the exhortation "You Can - If You Will!" someone had amended, "You're Canned If You Won't!"
Office copy machines, I've noted, usually have an often necessary sign on them stating something like, "For problems, call extension 233". Just as often, the office wit will have added a comment. One I saw, for-example, read, 'No thanks - I have plenty of my own!" A lot of us recognize the feeling behind that!
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